Apple To Be Bought By Microsoft?

By MacMilitia.com Staff 

In shocking news today, Steve Jobs has announced he is stepping down from his iCEO position at Apple, and only fifteen minutes later Apple was bought by one of its own executives. Jobs has declared Apple "an impossible company which is un-savable." Many believed Jobs had done the impossible in 1999 by saving Apple with such products at the iMac, however this latest development proves Apple's supporters wrong. Even with an incredible financial situation, a strong product line, and many fans in both the consumer and press circles, it seems Apple as a company has failed.

The story turned stranger later today when Apple CFO Fred Anderson announced he made enough money day trading to purchase Apple. According to a release, Mr. Anderson plans to "use Apple to launch my political career, by quickly selling Apple's assets off to interested buyers." Could it be that Microsoft is secretly forcing the destruction of Apple?

No one worth talking to was available for comment. Oh, and one more thing...

April Fools! from your friends at MacMilitia.com

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